To Ever Be Sincere and True

we have returned from our trip, and i'm glad to begin writing again.  while it was nice to have a break, i missed creating a little post for each week.  my thoughts lately have been about what goes on in my mind and comes out of my mouth regarding other people.  it's easy to be critical but hard to think only of the good in others.  i suppose most of us see others' faults but we are not inclined to look for their virtues.  it has been my intention for the past several days to "think kindly of others, and not to become angry or think badly of others."  this is a phrase i have repeated to myself every morning for many months, but recently i have been trying to live out this intention more mindfully.

i tell myself that, when i fail in my intention, i can forgive myself and renew my resolve.  the mind has a natural bent toward seeing what is bad rather than looking for the good.  our psyches are programmed in this way, and it takes much reprogramming to turn from this natural impulse.  buddhism teaches that we can train our minds, and it is my hope that by making it a special intention each day that i can learn to see the good in others and refrain from criticising the bad.

we cannot discern why others act and think in certain ways.  we don't often have detailed knowledge of their past, of their upbringing, of the factors that made them as they are.  what we see as faults in others may be misunderstood.  a person who is brusque and seems rude may not be so intentionally.  when we get to know such a person quite well, we often find that what we perceive as rudeness is something very different.  they may have been forbidden from speaking openly and honestly as children and forced to hide their natural exuberance in a "children should be seen and not heard" sort of household, so their speech patterns are short and to the point, while underneath their manner of addressing others is a tender heart.  ours is not to judge but to accept, to look beyond what seems to be and to try and discern the underlying truth.

may we look kindly on others, even when it seems difficult.  may we not dwell on their faults, but seek out their virtues.  may we be accepting, even when it is easier to reject.  may we not build ourselves up by tearing down others.  may we love without condition.  shalom.